19th Ashan, 722
Elisabeth agreed that she'd like to accompany her behind the barriers, and Faith nodded. "It requires preparation," she said. "And you need to be clear that marks, magics, items, none of them work. Also, it's bloody freezing." Faith grinned slightly. "I suggest that we use these," she said and handed Elisabeth one of a pair of Echo Scrolls. "You know how they work?" If Elisabeth didn't, Faith would show her, but if she did she would just pass one of the pair of scrolls on. That done, she considered when might be the best time to go. They could work the details out, she was sure, and the echo scrolls would facilitate that.
Faith was happy to plan further, to consider things. "You've read the accounts from when we went there previously," she said, as a statement of fact rather than a question. "But I'm going to be taking some potions and medical things there, I want to keep trying to arrange a more permanent solution to being over there, and there are a whole range of scientific experiments I want to try." How Padraig had survived this long, Faith didn't know and it was very much something which worried her on a moment-by-moment basis. But she had faith that he would look after himself and that Frosvinndur would ensure his safety.
When Elisabeth asked her next question, though, Faith raised an eyebrow, just slightly. It obviously was quite a tricky question to ask and Elisabeth asked it with a few pauses to find the right words ~ pauses which told Faith that she was not exactly comfortable. But, she got the question out and Faith considered it for a few moments. "You understand that I am Famula's servant, and so I believe her. I trust her. As the Immortal of Souls, she does more than understand souls, and so I would trust her even if I was not her follower. In the way that Xiur understands hope, she understands souls." She met Elisabeth's gaze. "And she is fervently, ardently, anti-magic because of what it does to our Souls." Faith sat, her hands crossed in her lap, as she regarded Elisabeth.
"The Spark is a parasite which attaches itself to your soul and changes it." She spoke gently, not accusingly, but she was clear. "It pushes you to cast more, to grow in power - because the more you do, the more it attaches itself, the more it feeds off you, and the more it changes you as a person." Meeting Elisabeth's gaze, she was clear. "Any mage - every mage - accepts an alien intelligence into them, allowing it to attach to their soul in exchange for power and then, accepts that as that power grows, so too does the influence of the alien intelligence on their soul." She gave a slight shrug, opening her hands, palm outward, in a gesture of uncertainty. "What does the spark want? It wants to grow, to develop. It's growth and development change the nature of who you are, change you at a soul level."
Faith sighed, slightly. She did not an never would understand the willingness to accept an alien parasite in order to be more powerful. That wasn't her way, she went about things quite differently, but she also knew that she had a duty to answer Elisabeth's question fully. "I believe that the answer to your question is a more personal one," she said. "Your spark pushes you. Drives your behaviour. Encourages and rewards certain behaviours it wants to see, punishes others." Faith was usually a person who smiled a lot, but her expression here was serious. "If it wants you to be using magic constantly, how will it react to your priorities shifting and changing as a child first grows within you and then is born? If it seeks to make you explore, discover - in fact, however it asserts its will and dominance on your behaviour, if you fall pregnant then you will change. Immediately, completely, and at a soul level." That prompted a smile. It was the absolute truth. However, Faith's expression soon sobered.
"How will your spark react to the very soul it is changing, the source of it's power and the part of you which it is moulding, how will it react to that change?" Faith considered what she knew, medically. "I know that being a mage changes your blood, each type of magic doing so somewhat differently. Your body is a swirling mass of ether, you will exchange and sustain any child with blood which is tainted by that. But, if you experience your spark's pushing and pulling of your personality - if you are aware of it - think of how it will react to you becoming pregnant. If you would choose not to cast while pregnant to avoid overstepping and the possibility of mutation? How will the spark feel about newfound caution? How will it like forced stagnation? What will it do?"
She had this conversation - or one like it - with Qit'ria. Qit had gotten pregnant and had then not cast or used magic at all during her pregnancy. "I know of at least one person who experienced quite a fight with their spark both before and after their pregnancy," Faith said. "It changed her, and the spark didn't like it." Did that answer the question? Not entirely no. "Because each spark inside each mage manifests differently, there is no concrete answer that I am aware of. We know about pregnancy and marks, because marks are consistent. But magic is unique and individual to each. So, the question is how will your spark react? It isn't able to be reasoned with and you made an agreement that it and you would share your soul. If you conceive a child, you're seeking to change the terms of that agreement, since your soul will no longer be yours alone." She smiled slightly. "That said, I have no information on sparks damaging children directly, and I am - as I said - speaking as a servant of the Immortal of Souls who believes and teaches us that magic is a very, very bad idea." Sitting back, she looked at Elisabeth and asked, "Does that go some way towards answering your question?"
