• Solo • How to Stare at Mutants 101

[Devin]

Ashan 22, Arc 721

On the 22nd of Ashan, Devin Thorn, medical genius in progress, unexpected Baron and owner of Scalvoris’ one and only winged goat (At least he hoped so!) was sitting in front of the incredibly luxurious vanity table in his bedroom and getting ready for university. He wouldn’t just attend a class that trial though; he would be teaching a class, and he would be doing so as a Licentiate student for the first time. He planned on looking his best!

Over-the-top hairstyles were in fashion that season. Normally, he didn’t really care what was in fashion in a certain season because he was someone who wanted to set trends rather than following them, but he just loved being over-the-top so much. For that reason, he had decided to do things a little differently that trial.

He started by backcombing and teasing his hair with a very fine comb in order to give it more volume before he grabbed a small spray bottle with coconut oil and carefully spritzed his hair with it in order to make it look shinier – because he didn’t only want an over-the-top hairstyle, he also wanted a shiny one. Next came intricate hair ornaments made of pure gold and Kunzite which was a violet stone that just matched the color of his eyes so well.

And then came the clothes. For a little while, he had considered combining as many current trends as possible, but excessively colorful scarves and socks made of rainbow wool and delicate hair ornaments wouldn’t look good together, so he went for a very extravagantly cut black suit with golden, violet and silver embroidery, with a jacket that had a high collar and spiked shoulders instead. Of course, the spikes were golden!

Sometimes, it was good if parts of your look were a tiny bit more understated in his opinion!

He decided to incorporate another trend into his look though, namely belts, and he decided to wear two belts, both made of black leather, one that was actually for his pants, and one that he just wrapped around his waist for decorative purposes, and then he slipped into a pair of short black leather boots, grabbed his backpack (also made of black leather so that it would match the rest of his clothes) and went on his way.

He walked through Scalvoris Town and to the university with a spring in his step, because he liked the way he looked, he was looking forward to teaching, and because the sun was shining. He had really missed the sun during those long, dark Cylus trials. And it was finally getting a bit warmer again. That was great as well. He liked snowball fights and building snowmen and such, but shoveling a path from his door, through the garden and to the street several times a seven-trial had not been his idea of fun.

And what more, he was really looking forward to finally being able to go swimming again!

[Devin]

Once he had reached the classroom that was still empty, Devin immediately set his backpack down on the desk that stood at the front of the room, rooted through the drawers until he had found a piece of chalk and approached the blackboard in order to draw something.

First of all, he drew a face that was only approximately round. A moment later, he added an extremely crude mouth, two more circles for the eyes and two vaguely triangular things on top of the circle that were supposed to be horns but actually didn’t look like much of anything. After he had given the matter some thought, he drew a third horn between the first two – because the thing on the blackboard was supposed to be an incredibly mutated monster. An incredibly mutated monster had more than two horns!

It was just as he took a step back and eyed his masterpiece critically, hands on his hips, that something occurred to him. He had forgotten to draw ears and a nose. That, he decided after he had thought about it for a bit, was alright though. Maybe, his monster was so mutated that its ears and its nose had just fallen off. Maybe it didn’t need ears and a nose anymore, because it could hear through its eyes and smell with its mouth now!

Since a drawing alone might not be enough to make it obvious what he would be talking about that trial, he eventually grabbed the piece of chalk again and added a couple of words that he had more or less come up with on the fly in his wonderfully messy handwriting: “How to Stare at Mutants 101: Anamnesis is the first step to a correct diagnosis!”

Satisfied, he plopped down on his chair with a huge grin on his face, reached into his backpack in order to remove a chocolate chip cookie from his lunchbox and started munching on it, sighing with pleasure, just as the first couple of students – they were all Letter students - arrived and eyed his work of art curiously before they looked at him with his over-the-top hairstyle and his very extravagant suit.

He abruptly sat up straighter, grinned all over his face and proceeded to wave at them because he absolutely loved being looked at, and he loved it when people looked at his art, too!

[Devin]

“So”, Devin said once the classroom was full, abruptly jumped up from his chair, made a few steps – and sat down on the desk, grinning even more than before if that was at all possible. “To-trial, I’ll obviously talk about anamnesis”, he told them and gestured towards the blackboard again, in case not all of them had taken a look yet. “Before I start doing so, I’d like to ask you all a question though. Let’s imagine that you are already finished with your studies and working as doctors, and you have a patient. Their skin has turned green overnight, and what more, their tongue is bright blue, and they can suddenly see spirits and other things like that!”

“How do you figure out if they had some sort of alchemical accident, an Awakening – which is the kind of mutation that happens when you progress your magic – touched a cursed artifact for some reason or had an encounter with a magical tree?” he wanted to know and looked at a young man that was probably some sort of half Eidisi, judging by his skin that had a blue tinge. The kind of blue skinned young man looked at him in surprise for a moment before he blinked and proceeded to stare at him blankly. Devin could practically see the wheels turning in his head.

“Ummm”, he finally made and scratched his head before he guessed, “If they had an alchemical accident, they probably smell funny? Potions often smell kind of funny.”

“No”, Devin retorted in a cheerful tone of voice. “You don’t sniff at them. You don’t poke them either. You can’t diagnose a mutation correctly just by sniffing at the patient, at least not usually. I mean, I probably could, but that’s a special and very advanced technique”, he pointed out. “You talk to them. Unless the patient suffers from amnesia or is a total idiot, they might be able to provide you with important clues. That’s essentially what anamnesis is all about. Don’t ask me who came up with that word though”, he added and made a face for a moment because he really didn’t like that word. Why did medical terminology always have to be so weird and complicated?

He was just about to start to talk about how you went about taking an anamnesis – he just loved talking, and he really liked the sound of his own voice – when another student, this time a young woman with short, curly blonde hair and brown eyes had a question.

“Doctor Thorn?” she wanted to know, sounding rather confused. “Why is this class called ‘How to Stare at Mutants 101’ if we don’t actually stare at them, if you don’t mind me asking? And aren’t mutations and magic and such really advanced? Wouldn’t it be better if our imaginary patient had the flu or an allergy or something like that? We’ve barely learned the basics. We only started our studies this cycle!”

“I was just trying to come up with a catchy title”, Devin replied. Having said that, he pouted for a moment because his student obviously didn’t share his love of mutants before he claimed, smiling brightly once more, “This is just an example, of course. Taking an anamnesis is kind of the same no matter which condition you are dealing with. And besides, mutations are pretty common on Scalvoris! Take a closer look at some of the plants or animals. Why, I even mutated myself! My eyes used to be brown once!” he told her in an enthusiastic tone of voice because he liked his new eyes much better.

They were great!

[Devin]

What Devin had said about taking an anamnesis being similar, no matter which condition you were dealing with had actually been true. He had also decided to use the class as an excuse to talk about one of his favourite topics ever though, and he didn’t even feel bad about it. He specialized in mutations and magical accidents and such, and he was even going to write his thesis about mutants. So, really, what did his students expect from him?

Did they expect him to talk about warts, sprained ankles or some other nonsense?

Despite his slight attitude problem and his desire to be in the spotlight, the young Mortalborn really, really wanted to be a good teacher, and he wanted his students to learn something (and like him, of course), so he decided to explain what an anamnesis was all about in more detail, in a very chipper tone of voice, “Right. So, first of all, you introduce yourself so that your patient knows that you are actually their doctor and not the cleaning lady or something like that … or the cleaning lord”, he added.

A moment later, he furrowed his brow. Was the male version of a cleaning lady really a cleaning lord? Or a cleaning gentleman? In any case, they cleaned. That was what mattered!

Grinning at his students some of whom looked at him a little blankly because they weren’t sure what to make of this talk about cleaning ladies and cleaning lords and people like that had to do with the matter at hand, he continued, “So, once they know who you are, and you know who they are, you ask them why they need your help. Once they have answered, you ask them questions to further clarify the problem, such as how long the symptom has been affecting them, what makes the symptom worse, and if there are any other symptoms – on, and finding out their past medical history is important as well”, he added.

“And oh!” he continued and stood because his behind had started to hurt a little (The desk was hard!), only in order to march over to the wall next to the blackboard, leaned against it in a casual manner and cross his arms over his chest. “You should also take their family history because some conditions run into the family – and find out more about their daily life – because they can play a part as well. Sometimes, asking the patient if they have an idea as to what could be going on can be helpful as well.”

“Sometimes, they also think that they have a heart attack when it’s just a simple case of heartburn though”, he pointed out. before he continued in an enthusiastic tone of voice because talking about doctoring was a lot of fun, “The information that you obtain that way, combined with the physical examination, enables you to form a diagnosis and decide on a treatment plan. In general, it’s a good idea to perform the physical examination after taking the anamnesis for that reason. You could try doing it the other way round, but I’m not sure how much use that would be”, he informed his students before he looked at them expectantly. He was becoming a really good teacher, wasn’t he?

Unfortunately, some of them still looked at him blankly (while others seemed to be more focused on his outfit which he couldn’t help but approve of despite everything). Finally, one of the students, a young man with curly brown hair, raised a hand and asked,

“You told us how to take an anamnesis and such. But how are we actually supposed to talk to the patient? How do you talk to patients, if you don’t mind me asking, Doctor Thorn?”

Devin furrowed his brow for a few moments and racked his brain because that was something that he had forgotten to prepare for. He was pretty sure that Professor Hamilton-Smith had said something along those lines once though. Finally, he exclaimed brightly, “With empathy, of course. You should try to be empathetic, if possible”, he clarified, smiling his most charming smile. In truth, he wasn’t sure about empathy and such. It made him think of coddling the patients which was something that didn’t always work. In fact, sometimes nothing short of some sort of sledgehammer approach got the point across in his experience!

His dear professors, he had unfortunately realized, might not approve of telling your patients that they were idiots who'd just end up killing themselves if they didn't do what you said which led to a bit of a dilemma, to be honest because he really wanted that Licentiate.

Maybe, he'd just be able to tell his students what doctoring was really like outside of class though? The professors wouldn't be able to police extracurricular activities! He could invite them for coffee and bake a cake for them. He could teach them that some patients were just suicidal idiots and give them another opportunity to admire him at the same time. That would be great!

With that thought in mind, he waited for his students to ask more questions - and they came quite promptly.

"Doctor Thorn", another student wanted to know. "You told us that we should imagine a patient with green skin, a bright blue tongue and the ability to see spirits and such before. What actually happened to them? What would the result of the anamnesis and the examination be in that case?"

This time, Devin was the one who stared blankly - because he hadn't considered that his students might actually inquire about the hypothetical mutant patient – because they were just hypothetical. He furrowed his brow slightly for a few moments before he finally told them, grinning, having decided to draw on his personal experience (something kind of similar had happened to him once), "They volunteered as a test subject for an alchemist - because they really needed the money. The alchemist told them he was trying to invent a flight potion. He wasn't very good though, so they just got weird side effects instead of acquiring the ability to fly. As for the spirit thing - that happened because an Immortal marked them while they were asleep!"

"Really", he insisted when his students looked at him incredulously. Before he had found out that he was a Mortalborn, he had thought that he had acquired the ability to see the future because an Immortal had snuck into his bedroom and marked him while he had been asleep.

He still considered such a thing to be possible, even though he knew the truth about his ability now!

"The patient would very much like to keep the ability to see spirits", he continued because he had also mentioned deciding on a treatment plan before. "But they'd like to look normal again - which is something that might actually happen automatically. The effects of potions usually aren't permanent", he pointed out.

At least, the side effects that he had suffered had fortunately gone away again!

With that thought in mind, Devin wanted to know if his students had any more questions. Finally, when they didn't have anything more to say to him, he bade them farewell and waved at them, quite happily and excitedly. He was in fact so happy and excited that he forgot to give them homework which was something that he unfortunately only realized when the classroom was already empty, and he was about to pack his own things and leave. But then again, what kind of homework could he give them about taking an anamnesis?

They were mere Letter students! Letting them loose on real patients and making them take an anamnesis would be irresponsible, and he couldn't think of anything else.

Maybe, he'd let them play doctor and patient next time though.

Maybe, one of them could play a mutant, and the other one could try to take an anamnesis.

That would be fun!

[Jackalope]

Experience: +10 xp

Knowledge:

Cosmetology: Backcombing gives your hair more volume
Cosmetology: Coconut oil makes your hair shiny
Cosmetology: Combining current fashion trends
Drawing: A very crudely drawn monster head
Medicine: How to take an anamnesis
Medicine: Perform a physical examination after taking an anamnesis

Skillplay: Appropriate to level

Loot: None.

Injuries/Overstepping: None.

Magic Experience?: None.

Renown: +5. Introducing himself to a new class. In style, of course.

Comments:

Devin should hire an assistant. That way he could have an amanuensis take his anamnesis. And shovel snow from his walk. And be his cleaning lord.

Devin’s threads are always so fun. He combines vanity and self-involvement with a sometimes unacknowledged degree of genuine concern for others in an engaging way. And although he manages to carry out his duties ably, he takes just enough time and energy to indulge his foibles. The setup with Devin drawing the funky picture of the titular mutant was a nice touch.

The students in Devin’s class seem kind of stiff and literal; perhaps they’re just nervous and will relax and have more fun once they get more used to their instructor. I actually like the idea of assigning them histories to role play and take turns as patient and doctor in the next class session! Might get them to loosen up a bit.

Let me know if you have any questions/feedback. Enjoy your rewards!