Wings of a half breed

Once an isolated and dying township, an influx of academics, adventurers and thrill seekers have made Scalvoris Town their home. From scholars' tea shops to a new satellite campus for Viden Academy, this is an exciting place to visit or make your home!

Moderators: Pegasus Pug!!!, Avalon

User avatar
Approved Character
Posts: 157
Joined: Sat Mar 13, 2021 3:02 pm
Race: Mixed Race
Renown: 0
Character Sheet
Character Wiki
Point Bank Thread
Wealth Tier: Tier 5



Wings of a half breed

Ashan 3 721

Bickering of fiscal duties filled Goku’s ears at the dinner table. He’d invited the neighbors over for lunch only for the couple to go at each other’s throats over some issue Goku cared little about. It was blarney from his perspective. Nonsensical and childish. He felt that the argument was beneath him. Something about colors and food.

“I’ve just got to get out of here,” he thought over in his head. His facial expression wasn’t beguiling in the least anymore.

“I’ve just forgotten that I was mean to go shopping before the night comes,” Goku lied to the guests. He was ignored so he repeated his message with an elevated voice but he was ignored again. “eesh” he said as he got to his feet. He walked over between them and waved his arms while shouting until they finally shut their traps. “Let’s take this outside ya? I don’t need anything breaking again.” He ushered the angry couple out of the door and Goku locked the wooden frame behind him.

“What a waste of my precious time,” the winged man said to himself under his breath. “Don’t know why I even bother. It always turns out the same with those two, but they’re the only neighbors I’ve got that I’d want over. The others are just plain weird. ‘Suppose I can’t be too bothered though. This is the best spot in town I can afford so I can’t expect to be around the best sort of people.” He shook off some feathers from his ever present wings, those that were just loose enough to fall out on their own. How troublesome these wings were, but he couldn’t complain.

Goku had never been a great flier. To use one’s wings to take off into the sky and fly around like a bird wasn’t exactly his style. He’d spent much of his life living as a human, so much time. The wings were what made him stand out.

“Maybe I’ll try using them today,” he hummed while walking down the street. The cobbled stone felt cool under his feet, much cooler than the breeze that ruffled his feathers and tickled his hair. “Couldn’t hurt to try,” he thought. “Only problem is finding a good spot. If I try this out here I’m likely to end up crashing through a window. There’s got to be some kind of park big enough and empty enough to try.”

The back of his mind brought up a point, “wouldn’t it look bad to go flying around like a fool? You’re much too old to start learning how to use wings. You’re trying to make a positive image for yourself so you can one day be an elite military member. Being known as the bumbling buffoon that can’t even fly right isn’t a good look.”

To his subconscious’ credit, Goku had to say that it was right. In response he thought, “sure, but it’d be a bigger shame if I was thought to be able to use things wings properly and being unable to perform. Not to say that I’d be taken on purely because of my physical features, but if I were… I would be expected to use the wings right?”

All this inner dialogue was hurting his head. He was a fighter not a thinker. Goku turned down several streets that were increasingly sparse. It was only a short walk away to the park he had in mind. He hummed some more and tried tapping his left hand’s fingers along the pommel of his sheathed sword that was securely fastened to his waist. It was a pretty average weapon, just the way Goku liked weapons. Tapping it made him remember how badly he wanted to learn how to properly use it. Today wasn’t the day for that.

“I should probably take it off before I start trying to use the wings. Don’t want to self impale or anything ridiculous.” He hummed. He undid the straps right as he got to the park. He looked closely around the park and saw a large area that was currently unused. He’d need it. It was grassy too, perfect.

Goku laid the sword down carefully off to the side. It leaned securely against a tree’s trunk and was kept company by Goku’s coat which was folded neatly. It was as people told him when he was young, “money doesn’t grow on trees” so he had to keep what he had in good condition. Goku took out the remaining items from his pockets and placed them underneath the coat as an afterthought. The realization occurred to him that things could fall out mid flight. “I’d never find anything if something fell into the tall grass,” he realized.

At long last Goku stood unhindered by his worldy possessions. His wings stretched out to each side of his body to their full extent. The feeling of stretching them out properly was relieving. To have them folded and always nicking on his clothes was annoying. Armor was also very annoying on the occasions that he could justify wearing it.

“You can do this,” he told himself, “you’ve seen take offs a million times in your life. Catch the wind, ride the heat.” He knelt down and waited for a surge in the breeze. He waited minutes with his wings outstretched and curved naturally so that they could catch the wind more easily. He heard the wind before it came. The grass around him rustled vigorously and Goku clenched his center in anticipation. The wind caught on his wings and forced him into the air.

“I’ve done it. By the grace of the heavens, I’ve done it!” he exclaimed as he lifted off the ground. His wings spread out to release the breeze and he flexed his underused back muscles to cause the wings to flap as quickly as they could. Instead of taking off into the sky Goku slowly descended to the ground. “Come ON” he encouraged. He put maximum effort into flapping harder but the moment had passed. He knew not what the problem was, though he suspected it had something to do with his general weakness. He was trying to lift a considerable weight. “Flapping is a lot harder than I thought it would be,” he thought when he finally touched down.

He was a determined youth that was not to be put down after one attempt, however. “Again, but this time with less flapping and more power,” he told himself while crouching down and waiting for another big gust of wind to come by. Crouching down was all he needed to do to feel the pain in his back. This was likely to be his final attempt. He was going to have to accept that he couldn’t expect true flight today if he barley had function of the muscles necessary to use wings since they were so underused at this point in his life.

Minutes passed again but the gust surely came. This one was bigger than the last and launched Goku into the air by several meters. The height scared the hybrid more than it should have for someone with wings. He panicked and panic flapped as it was simply instinctual. He slowly descended, safely for the most part except for the final few feet when another gust came along and pushed Goku into the ground where he tumbled into the tree where his stuff was.

Bruises were on the menu. Goku laid there on the grass for what seemed like a half hour before feeling confident enough to stumble to his feet. “I’m starting to remember why I don’t like using these wings,” he said while reaching his arms up to the heavens. He stretched them and his wings in unison. It was a soothing experience but play time was over. Goku re-quipped all his stuff except for the sword. It was too painful to turn to the side to attach it properly so he held it in both hands lovingly while walking back to his house.

“Oh right, I left those two unattended,” he realized with a sinking heart when he got back to his neighborhood. His day had been so good since he left his home. He’d gotten to practice a bit of flying, take a nice relaxing walk… if he forgot his bruises he would have called the day perfect, except for those bickering neighbors. The good news? He couldn’t hear the bickering anymore. To his great relief he found that the husband and wife had quieted down. Goku jammed the key into the lock on his door, fiddled with it for longer than probably necessary, and finally was able to take a nice rest inside his own quiet home. “Maybe tomorrow I can try using the sword in the back yard,” he said. He jotted down a note on the piece of paper that was supposed to be form important notes. It had been blank, just to show that there wasn’t very much going on in his life at the moment.

word count: 1557
User avatar
Peer Reviewer
Peer Reviewer
Posts: 3564
Joined: Sat Sep 03, 2016 3:43 am
Race: Mortal Born
Profession: Alchemist
Renown: 1162
Character Sheet
Character Wiki
Plot Notes
Point Bank Thread
Wealth Tier: Tier 10

Re: Wings of a half breed


Endurance x 1
Strength x3
Flying x2

Loot: -
Lost: -
Wealth: -
Injuries: Bruises because Goku landed in a tree. Furthermore, Goku caught a cold because he flew without his coat on and was lying on the cold ground for half a break after his flying practice. It’s nothing bad, he’ll just sneeze a bit and have a runny nose for the next couple of trials. The bruises should disappear again before long as well.
Renown: 5, for hosting a horrible meal and practicing flying in a public park.
Magic XP: -
Skill Review: See below.
Points: 10
- - -
Comments: Goku’s neighbours sound pretty annoying. You conveyed that well. I’m surprised that he tolerated their presence as long as he did. I would probably have thrown them out and locked the door as well!

His thinking that they are the only two neighbours that he wants over because the other neighbours are just plain weird makes me wonder though. How bad are his other neighbours?!

I wish you had described the neighbors’ reaction to being thrown out in more detail though.

Anyway, going flying sounds like a good distraction from his annoying neighbours. I appreciate your RPing Goku’s Novice Flying – and especially you mentioning his trying to lift a considerable weight. Hopefully, things will go better the next time he practices flying!

That being said, there were a few issues with this thread.

You mentioned tall grass and rustling grass and Goku lying on the grass. I reminded you to pay attention to the weather before. This is what the Scalvoris calendar says about early Ashan:
The beginning of Ashan is rigidly cold on Scalvoris, starting with a cold period which lasts for a quarter of the season before the temperature finally heats up enough to begin sowing crops for the arc.
There is no tall grass in early Ashan. It is, as the quote above says, rigidly cold which is why I’m a bit concerned about Goku taking his coat off before he went flying.

You also overplayed your Persuasion skill in my opinion. Goku has 0 Persuasion (and no points in Leadership either), but when he uninvited his neighbors and told them to take it outside, they just seemed to go along with it.

Furthermore, I would have added “Deception” to the list of skills used as Goku lied to his neighbours about having to go shopping in order to get rid of them. “Discipline” might have been involved as well as their presence seemed to be pretty hard to bear and he panicked when he was flying, among other things.

Finally, I found your thread a bit hard to understand and confusing at times. That’s something that can easily be fixed by proofreading your posts before you submit them though!

There were issues in regard to skill overplay and other things in at least three out of four threads of yours that have been reviewed so far, apart from this one:

A very average day
fighting with liss
sword lessons for beginners

As per the Peer Reviewer Guide you have reached Step 2. This is your final step before a warning is given. Please pay more attention to how you RP your skills from now on!

It might be a good idea to delete your remaining review requests, check them for skill overplay and other issues and edit them, in case you notice anything, before you resubmit them.

That being said, enjoy your rewards and let me know if you have any questions, please!
word count: 592





Worn Items

Ring of Reversal
Ring of Immunity
Post Reply Request an XP Review Claim Wealth Thread

Return to “Scalvoris Town”