• Solo • Pepper Explosion

The cities and villages of Melrath are as varied and diverse as they come. The capital of Raelia is the the jewel of this western kingdom, playing host to a merchants, artisans, Aesir priests, as well as a cut throat political landscape dominated by the nobles of Raelia. To the south in the depths of the Myrkvior Forest lies Melrath's second largest, and oldest city, Fensalir. Here people have learned to live alongside spirits and the natural world by maintaining their loyalty to traditions laid down the first Melrathi. To the east lies the small fishing village of Noatun, and to the western mountains rests the Mer city of Verimeer, the brewing town of Alivilda and the alpine village Vormund.
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Tristan Venora
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Posts: 1484
Joined: Sun Apr 24, 2016 11:47 am
Race: Human
Profession: Mad Scientist Socialite
Renown: 969
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Wealth Tier: Tier 10

Pepper Explosion

Cylus 1, Arc 720

Tristan stood in his kitchen that was also his laboratory, head bent over a cauldron where a lime green liquid was bubbling quite merrily. The house that he had acquired in Melrath had actually come with a real laboratory, albeit a tiny one, but he preferred to brew his potions where he cooked his food, nevertheless. Old habits died hard sometimes.

“I need to do more, Mistral”, the noble who was dressed in a most fashionable long, powder blue robe that was tied with a silver silk sash, Raelian style, informed his cat that was sitting on the counter next to him. “I’m still not the best alchemist in Idalos! But what shall I make after this potion that will hopefully turn someone’s skin green? I already made ice burn, and of course I created that anti-winter potion!”

He paused for a moment in order to grab one of the sandwiches that Hannah, one of his bodyguards/roommates had prepared for him and took a large bite because all that thinking made him hungry – only to abruptly spit it into the trashcan, a look of utter shock on his face.

“Ahhh!” he exclaimed, his eyes wide and his face a bright shade of red and coughed. The sandwich had been so spicy that the entire interior of his mouth burned like fire. Apparently, Hannah had spilled the pepper jar on it. He quickly grabbed a glass of water in order to wash the terrible taste down, dumped what remained of the sandwich into the trashcan as well and – smiled brightly.

“I know what I’ll make, Mistral!” he informed the cat that just stared at him from out of sulfur-yellow eyes. Being a resident of the Misty Miasma that had been stranded in Idalos, Mistral was somewhat more intelligent than an ordinary housecat, but he was also quite arrogant and indifferent towards most bipedal creatures and their various problems.

“I’ll make a pepper potion! I’ll make a pepper potion that you can throw in someone’s face in order to scare them away! That would be fun, don’t you think? It would be a good alternative to killing your enemies. I don’t like killing people. Besides, you could take it where weapons aren’t allowed! I wonder if there’s still some pepper left or if Hannah used all of it for those disgusting sandwiches”, he mused.


With that thought in mind, Tristan Venora, Blessed of both Zanik and Vhalar and Duke of Oakleigh (currently in exile due to the plague and other unpleasant problems), rummaged through the kitchen cupboards until he found a second jar of pepper that seemed almost full. He opened it in order to make sure that it contained enough pepper – and sneezed loudly, rubbing his nose that was running a little now, before he carried it over to the table.

A binder (snail slime, his binder of choice – he actually kept a terrarium full of snails in his laboratory just for that purpose), a primer (some sort of weird vaguely purple crystal powder) and a metabolizer that had somehow ended up in the same cupboard as the spices – metabolizers increased the potency of a potion – followed in quick succession.

Since Tristan wanted to make a potion and not some sort of extra spicy spice blend with a hint of snail slime, he also grabbed a bottle of his favourite wine ever – Venora Rose. Alcohol was a good base for potions, from what he had found out, and it also increased a potion’s shelf life greatly.

While he looked for a clean pot (dirty equipment that still contained traces of other potions could render your creation useless at best and be hazardous to your health at worst), Mistral jumped off of the counter and left without a single meow, as if he had lost interest in Tristan’s alchemy. Apparently, Tristan realized, he would have to make his pepper potion without an audience. He sighed. He really loved it when people (and animals) watched him!


Approximately ten bits later, the young duke who was wearing a mask and goggles in order to protect his eyes and not accidentally inhale something had finally started a fire in the stove and dumped … well, no, he didn’t simply dump his reagents into a pot or a cauldron, he actually used a spoon to measure his reagents so that the potion would contain approximately the same amount of each reagent which was as much chemistry as he was willing to engage in for the time being. He disliked chemistry, mainly because of Padraig Augustin, the husband of the woman that he had loved once upon a time and that he still considered to be a friend.

Padraig probably thought that chemistry was a really important skill for an alchemist to have, judging by what he knew of him.

In his opinion, it wasn't necessary unless you practiced Blood Magic and other weird stuff though.

Once he had added all the reagents that he needed in order to make a potion that hopefully worked, he grabbed a wooden spoon, the kind of which cooks usually used to stir whatever they were working on in order to stir his potion in progress as he had no interest in letting it scorch. Such would not be particularly conductive to the effectiveness of his potion. At least he didn’t think that it would be. Maybe he’d try it out sometime regardless though!

When the mixture in his pot started to bubble and sizzle and turn a somewhat suspicious and not entirely appealing dull grey color, Tristan knew that it was ready. He put a pair of thick mittens on, swiftly removed the pot from the stove and set it down next to it in order to let the mixture cool down before he realized that … by Zanik, Vri and Vhalar, he didn’t have any containers that he would be able to put his new potion into!

What kind of container should he use for a potion that was supposed to be thrown in people’s faces though? Should he just use the glass vials that he usually filled his potions into? If he threw something made of glass in someone’s face, there’d probably be cuts and such, and if worse came to worst, someone might even lose an eye, and he didn’t want to actually wound someone. He just wanted them to run away and sneeze, and maybe he also wanted their eyes to burn a little!

Using glass vials would not be a good idea. What else could he use though?


He started to pace back and forth in his kitchen as he thought about that very important question. After a few bits, he suddenly had an idea – and practically raced into his bedroom and searched it. A few moments later, he returned with a little spray bottle that was filled with perfume (being a Venoran noble, he occasionally used some, but it was quite a subtle one rather than one of those awful ones that practically stank).

He opened the spray bottle, poured what was left of the perfume into the kitchen sink with a small hint of regret, washed the bottle thoroughly as whatever residue was still in it might interfere with the potion – or even render it ineffective - and then he filled his potion that had cooled down sufficiently in the meantime into the spray bottle, screwed it shut and smiled.

Hannah who had gone to a café with a friend (his bodyguards had free time and such, just like normal employees) found him sitting at the kitchen table when she came home, the perfume bottle in front of him, still smiling. The young red-haired woman arched an eyebrow questioningly, before she tentatively asked,

“Your Grace?”

“I just made a most interesting invention!”
the duke proclaimed. “A potion that you can spray in someone’s face in order to scare them away. This is going to be selling really well! We probably need more perfume bottles though. Even if Lianne and you allow me to use yours, we don’t nearly have enough perfume bottles! Do you know where perfume makers get their bottles from? No, matter I’ll just visit one and ask!” he decided, speaking so quickly that Hannah struggled to keep up.

He was just so enthusiastic about what he had just made though!

“Maybe I should also try to persuade one of the local alchemists to sell my inventions at their shop”, he then mused. “I’m not sure if selling potions out of my living room is the way to go. I should also promote my inventions more! By the way”, he continued. “I want to thank you for making those sandwiches for me! They gave me the idea for my new potion! Without you I would never have invented it!”

“How, if I may ask you, sir?”
a rather confused Hannah wanted to know. “I’m not sure what the lunch I prepared for you has anything to do with alchemy. I’m not an alchemist, and I don’t think I put anything unusual into them either …”

“The pepper!”
Tristan exclaimed. “You put pepper into the sandwiches! That was great!”

He really meant what he said. He didn’t mind that Hannah had messed up her sandwiches anymore. On the contrary, he was absolutely grateful for the fact that she was such an awful cook now!
word count: 1595
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Race: Mortal Born
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Re: Pepper Explosion

Review Rewards

So you like alchemy? Name all alchemists ever!

Points awarded: The full ten points


Alchemy x3
Chemistry x3

Magic: No magic exp

Other: Wealth thread but no wealth points requested. Good thing too since I still have no idea how the new system works.

Damn, Tristan's witch aesthetic is on point. Cauldron with green bubbly liquid. Robes. A black cat --well, not a cat, but that's irrelevant-- familiar. All he needs is a pointy hat and it'd be absolutely perfect!

To be honest, I'd have thought alchemy required very precise measurements rather than the 'that's about right, I think' guesswork Tristan does, but it seems to work for him. So I guess that means precise alchemy is only for nerds. And Padraig definitely is a big nerd who doesn't even realize that Tristan's way is faster, fancier and all-around superior to his own. But that's what you get if you try to do alchemy as a chemist. Pssssh.

Really though, Tristan creating fucking pepper spray as a result of eating a spicy sandwich is a pretty accurate representation of how people come up with new things. Often coincidences and mundane things serve to inspire, and sometimes they lead to groundbreaking discoveries. I label this thread as completely scientifically accurate, despite Tristan's workflow.

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word count: 268
Just because I shouldn't doesn't mean I won't.

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