Cobalt Blade

A city thrust in a land of magical corruption, where survival isn't taken for granted, Yaralon is a jewel on Eastern Idalos. It is world renown for its mercenary companies, for their spiritual culture that appears a bit backwards and counter intuitive to more "civilized" types. Yaralon is where the strong go to discover that they are anything but, and mercenaries learn that only Yari mercs are true mercs.

Moderator: Tempest

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Hina
Posts: 372
Joined: Tue Feb 12, 2019 4:00 pm
Race: Mixed Race
Renown: +390
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Wealth Tier: Tier 5

Cobalt Blade

Tue Apr 16, 2019 9:41 pm

I am quitting standing trials. It is clear that nobody here wants to rp with me nor do I think I will be missed in the slightest.

If you are a newbie, you should know that mods and even other players can ruin your character at any time and for any power trippy reason. In my time here, I have had mods simply not reply to my posts for weeks and weeks at a time, had my character waste half a season because a mod made up a rule to have my character thrown in jail, been made pregnant against my will, and also been assigned penalties against my will just because a non mod thought to give me a hard time. You can do a bit of research and find that only staff members have accomplished anything noteworthy in this game, because they are the only ones immune from random bullshit.

I would not reccomend this game to anyone looking to accomplish anything in a roleplaying game.
Last edited by Hina on Wed Apr 24, 2019 8:06 pm, edited 1 time in total. word count: 168
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Strange
General Staff
Posts: 238
Joined: Wed Mar 27, 2019 1:43 pm
Race: Undead (Ghost)
Renown: 0
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Wealth Tier: Tier 1
Medal count: 2

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Re: Cobalt Blade

Wed Apr 24, 2019 2:29 am


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Thread Review

Hina

Hina
Skill Points: +10 (cannot be used for magic)
Magic XP: None.

Renown: +5 (for boasting about being a mage to a merc company leader)

Injuries/Overstepping: None
Wealth Points: None
Loot: None

Skill Knowledges:
  • Blades (Greatsword): Difficult to unsheathe
  • Blades (Greatsword): The weight can throw your balance off
  • Blades (Greatsword): Wide, stabilizing stance
  • Persuasion: Teach me to demonstrate your proficiency
  • Seduction: Impress me for my favor
  • Loshova Spring’s Bounty: Areas closer to the Loshova grow fastest. This may make it difficult to hide
Non-Skill Knowledges:
  • none requested.
Notes: n/a.

Oh, the greatsword returns! Nice to see Hina struggling with the amount of magic she's taken on and trying to keep it from completely consuming her mind/life. It would have been nice to know the Yari merc's name, he seems like a great fit for a greatsword mentor for Hina. Hope to see him again in future threads.

The small bits of dialogue, even if it was Hina talking to herself, helped successfully bring some variety into the narrative.

Consider when different characters speak in dialogue right next to each other, to separate it by a paragraph break for easier readability (e.g. “I’ve got a greatsword of my own. Would you mind helping my form out a little?” “And why would I do that,”)

Great job and enjoy your rewards!

PM me if you have any questions, issues or concerns.

Total Word Count: 1611 words.
Review Request Link: viewtopic.php?p=116148#p116148
stampcodehere

word count: 278
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