• Mature • He was my North, my South, my East and West

Malcolm

97th of Vhalar 716

The capital city of the of Rynmere, here is seated the only King in Idalos.
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Elyna
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He was my North, my South, my East and West

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His words sent a chill down her back. She fought the grip on her fingers and tried to pull her hand free of his. Heat shot down her palm in a familiar wash and the mark was stolen. The action made her chest constrict. Where she would have been angry at his recklessness, she felt only empty sadness. He would still risk everything for her and still she only caused him pain. Once he had told her that the truth was a weapon, that she shouldn’t try and injure the messenger. She’d always considered the truth to be a poisoned blade, deadly in the wrong hands or dealt in the wrong way. Malcolm had heard the truth. It had spilled unprotected from her lips and it had wounded him.
He sank down, nose bleeding in a cascade of crimson. She stood and corrected her breaches, fingers sliding over the now smooth skin. Instead of obeying his order she opened the drawers and pulled out a linen wrap. With the cool fabric balled tight in her fingers she knelt beside the man and pressed it into his hands, something to help with the bleeding.
“Even before your Father intervened, I do not know that I would have jumped,” she admitted. Uncertain if could hear her through the pounding of his heart or the burn of the nosebleed. He looked awful, exhausted and with eyes she worried could cry tears of blood. She did not want Malcolm to die. A world without him remained unliveable. Yet he was dismissing her once more. Banishing her from their home. “He said that he laid a curse on me, that I would neither love nor find sorrow until I chose to accept both…it does not feel like a curse, but a blessing. I can think clearly now, without fear or pain and my thoughts are free.” The young woman reached out, touching her cool fingers against the warmer palm of his hand, “I will go because you bid me to leave, but still I know, above anything else, that I am yours and this is the truth.”
word count: 355
Malcolm
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He was my North, my South, my East and West

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“Vri?” Malcolm rubbed his temple, only able to keep his right eye open between blinks.
His breathing slowed a little, both eyes fell closed, his core shook and a shiver ran up his back, spread across his shoulders and saw him look at her, perplexed. “You were going to jump,” the man managed to accuse, “because I loved you too much, you don't like love and I loved you too much,” he barely made sense, fighting consciousness. “I wasn't obligated or disgusted, you surprised me,” he wet the roof of his mouth and tasted blood on his tongue. “I told you, it just surprised me. It just surprised me,” his head bowed, not to meet the balled fabric, but because his strength was gone. “Just nothing, and then.” Malcolm blinked awake, speech slurred like a drunk. “You have to go.”
As Elyna reached out for his palm, Malcolm pulled his hand away, “no,” he protested, but she caught his arm and spoke the words of Pre’s blessing. His mind went blank, brows raised and lip hung low as he paused and then uttered the words back to her. “I am yours,” the man agreed like solider, his tone as soft as a whisper, “this is the truth.”
Last edited by Malcolm on Tue Oct 08, 2019 8:31 pm, edited 1 time in total. word count: 210
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Elyna
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He was my North, my South, my East and West

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Something akin to panic lit in the woman. A taper to a firework and had her pushing the man backwards into the bed. Even now, with the essence of her being stripped back to automatic response, she was driven to preserve the Mortalborn. Fear was an emotion she had gladly shed but remained eager to return to its long held home in her heart. It had not been her intention to bind Malcolm to her with Pre's gift! It has barely been her intention to use the blessing at all. Only, when trying to speak the truth at any point these days it seemed the phrase was determined to pass her lips. Usually she took such card of her words but speaking so freely and unhindered by pain, the Skyrider had slipped. She aided Malcolm to lie back, head propped on a pillow and face turned to one side. She pressed the linen to his nose, trying to stem the flow of blood. Her hands shook, beyond her control. Satisfied that the bleeding had stopped the woman departed as she had been ordered, but only to wash her hands and arms.

It was then that she disobeyed the Wardens command. Summoned back to the room by the whimper of a child, who had suffered an empty belly for the majority of the day. She glanced at Malcolm before she bent and collected her daughter, feeding the baby before setting her down once more. Elsie was satisfied more quickly and slipped into deep dreams with ease.

Confident that Malcolm wouldn't wake for some time, Elyna made her preparations to depart. Gathering her clothes and a few practical items. Her limbs though we're heavy, as though weighted with lead. Her breathing became laboured as she moved through the house, lit only by the embers of the fire. Bag readied beside the door she returned to the room a final time. The floorboards tipped beneath her like the uneven deck of a ship in a storm and she stumbled. Arms outstretched her knees knocked against the bed and she dropped. Folding up like a paper chain she landed on her side of the bed. Too dizzy to straighten the woman curled up and counted to ten, then a hundred struggling for the energy to stand. As the numbers flew through her mind though, sleep claimed her where she lay. An exhaustion she could no more fight than gravity.
word count: 408
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He was my North, my South, my East and West

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Elyna


Points!:

Story: 5/5
Collaboration: 5/ 5
Structure: 5/ 5
Knowledge:

Intimidation: Holding and swinging a sword in just the right way.
Godric: Friend of Malcolm's
Avari: Friend of Malcolm's
Avari: Malcolm's former lover
Avari: Does she look a bit like Vanessa?
Malcolm: Has reached breaking point
Malcolm: Wants you to leave
Malcolm: You're his family
Malcolm: He is yours, this is the truth.

Loot:
NA
Fame:
NA
Magic:
These points may NOT be used for arcana
Malcolm


Points!:

Story: 5/5
Collaboration: 5/ 5
Structure: 5/ 5
Knowledge:

Discipline: Forcing yourself to look at what you really don't want to.
Elyna: Has met Godric and Avari
Elyna: Ashamed of what Marcus did
Elyna: Worried that you would see her differently after what Marcus did
Elyna: Felt that she had nothing to offer Elsie or you
Elyna: Met Vri
Elyna: Cursed by Vri
Elyna: Says Vri's curse feels like a blessing
Elyna: You are hers. This is the truth.
Marcus: Raped Elyna
Marcus: Carved his mark into Elyna's skin

Loot:
NA
Fame:
NA
Magic:
These points may NOT be used for arcana

Overview:

General comments. A deeply emotional thread where both of the pcs seem to be almost lost. I was completely entranced by the story you two wove. Not a lot of knowledges about skills etc, but such is the nature of a deeply personal thread.
Story Clear, beautiful and poignant, this story was woven with a real delicate beauty. I love how you both write and how the writing compliments each other, making a really wonderful read!
Structure No issues - all good!

Please do PM me if you think I've missed anything or you have any questions!
word count: 287
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~~Red in hoof and claw... ~~


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