Lavana had been left in quiet contemplation as she stood before her closet looking at the gear that had failed her as she crinkled her nose in disgust as she looked away turning her back on something she once loved and cherished.
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And picked up her bronze claymore thinking about her duel with Sephira, shed of been felled in a real fight with live blades. Truly she was her mother's greatest failure that evening in the cemetery, it should have been better fight but her mother's blood had not been enough a waste of an immortals lineage indeed.
She failed to match skills with Maxine, and had barely crossed the finish line having to rely on cheap tactics to finish a fight she didn't even have the skill to finish herself. She was a liability she was weak and pathetic? A heavy hitter? More like a disgrace, unworthy of her notice. How could she earn to be at the baroness of scarlet sunsets side when she bailed her out?
And her sword form was shoddy at best, was this truly the most that the daughter of Raskalarn could muster? Lackluster performances across the board, shed failed her friend on every level as the thoughts of her being speared through the foot lingered heavily on her mind. It was her fault it happened, shed been undisciplined in her approach and now Max she suffered for her indiscretion.
She was alone now, free to break down as she felt tears swelling in her Amber eyes like a cupcake bitch. Free now to weep, and lament on her failures as she picked up mighty two handed sword and lifted it with both hands despite the pain she felr in her chest as shed restthe flat of her sword on her forehead the steel her only comfort in her time of need as she let it out as streams of tears as she sniffled from her runny nose. How could she bear to be looked upon, pathetic and weak.
Kuras heraldic anthem in the infirmary a lie. Shed butchered an old woman, and killed only one enemy that day breaking even. And She was to believe she was a great warrior? Only one out of a hundred? That was the best she could do?
Rage filled her hands as she lifted her sword and brought it down on the leather armor from the long ago cutting it deep. Before the pain struck her and she dropped her sword from the shock intensifying what lurked within. Her frustration and anger as eyes glared with intensity picked her weapon up again and brought it down cleaving the nostalgic gear. She let out a gutteral scream her war cry as she lifted her sword and struck down again, and again and again the pain fueling her rage as she lost herself striking with pure hatred as she succumbed to fear she gritted her teeth with resentment and hate in her heart as she felt her body shaking as she picked it up and dropped it again cutting deeper into the leather destroying the things shed held close to her as her temper escalated and reached soaring new heights as she went wild with fury harnessing her truest most pure element as she went beserk losing control as she was degrading with every out of blood thirty blow shed watch that leather be devastated with every wild anger driven blow as she was seething in disgust of herself as she was having a mental break down.
Shed scream and let it out, striking without regard or mercy. Using her hatred of herself as fuel for the wild fire raging in her heart as she continued hammering away, flaying her gear with every fearsome sword stroke as she savagely beat the shit out of that armor. It begged her for mercy but was met with barbaric savagery.
"You want to see discipline mother!?!?! , I'll kill them all, and those that are lucky enough to be left alive will be so broken and desecrated they will beg for death!
You want to see devastation? I will show you a fury to match your own, I will become hatred incarnate and I'll lay waste to everything in my conquest it will be a massacre! Let me show you as I'll take rage, fury and hate and discipline it and channel it into a weapon and I'll annihilate my enemies and leave nothing, not there memory or there names as I'll write history in the blood of the fallen when they meet there demise .
DO, YOU HEAR ME!
DO YOU FUCKING HEAR ME!
I'll reach you, stacking there corpses to your castle in the sky and I'll climb mother. Oh how I'll fucking climb, I won't give up as I'll crawl through knives, walk through fire, and swim through gore, I'll give you what none other not even yourself could achieve. Watch me temper myself into a weapon worthy to be called your daughter,
Watch me, make you proud!
But watch me turn!
Watch your daughter resent you!
Lose it all, not even the compassion to ask your child if she was ok! After all shes been through!
I'm an Ivorian now! Do you hear me! A mother fucking Ivorian!!! "
As she let out her resentment she took her anguish out in full force as her sword cut the post to her bed with a resonating crack as shed carved the ornamental post with a positively brutal blow. As she dropped her sword and began heaving and breathing heavy finding her release of composure refreshing and free as she unchained herself from the things that binded her and dragged herself down. She let it all out in her out bursts as she let her sword go like a wrecking ball as she thrashed in her room like a barbarian dismantling her bed as she harnessed this horrible feelings finding power a physical strength behind them with every swipe shed break something dear to her as shed let it go. Her focus hellishly diabolical as she looked down in reflection of self resentment, the empty bottles of tequila and rum shed saved as a momento a constant reminder of her sub par performance as she let out a deafening shriek and swung her sword a murderous intent shed never experienced before as the blade blew through them exploding in fragments of glass and sound.
Her eyes were crazy filled with blood lust as she threw herself into an absolute frenzy hammering away with her claymore shattering the feelings that had once choked the life out of her as she grew through her degredation as she was delving deeper and darker the only light before her discipline as she channeled it through herself as she threw a tidal tantrum letting it out as The mortal born screamed bloody murder, as she waged a war on all fronts against herself.
Qylios had marked her out of pity, but she knew what she saw on Kura knew what that meant. The bitch didn't even have the dignity to check on her child as shed been, disarmed, disrobbed dumped into a hole to fend for herself and while being slashed and stabbed, beaten and rolled through glass. What kind of mother was this?
Her hyper critical gaze dissected herself and exposed her flaws, as she grit her teeth as her nose flared with disgust as she drew in a breath and went to work cleaving and hacking away at her shit laden life. Using self hatred as a catalyst to ascend as shed grip her heart break and physical aches and tear itself from her with blinding rage, the bitter words and emotions she felt fuel for the fire as it flared turbulently within her as radical bursts untamed and unchecked were becoming harnessed with purpose to explore her very nature as shed discipline herself to take hold of these feelings and put them into her sword; it was her soul. And envisioned those that would or had done her wrong, shed cut them down like the sacks of shit they were as she struck with a resonating purpose as shed show them a fucking crazy they'd never witnessed before.
No armor to hide behind as she let her inner drive consume her with absolute madness driving it towards as she cackled like a wicked bitch in her room as she entered a beserker frenzy as the things around her were left in ruination; no longer unchecked as she set forth dismantling what was mocking her.
Deep heavy breaths as she succumbed to exhaustion and excruciating pain as she tossed her sword like it was a worthless piece of shit on the ground and walked around her room amber eyes drifting to the wonders at her feet as shoes crunched beneath glass shards before finding sanctuary in the solemn corner of her room with only herself. Tears came as they built up and trickled down her cheeks while she scrunched her legs in tight and held herself around her knees in comfort as shed let those emotions blossom into something while momentary was magnificent in its own little as her bedroom lay in absolute carnage an absolute disheveled mess as she worked on breathing and letting it as she wept in seclusion. Lavana had finally let it all out as shed finally had enough and found her breaking point. The Mortal Born wept on her failures by herself alone and afraid, but found redemption in those feelings of dread like a bird set free.
Shed acknowledged she was alone in darkness with only the lulling whispers to comfort her as she began rocking herself and steadying her wisping breaths. As she calmed herself, she let it out, but her nerves steadied the pain in her chest throbbed and prodded but she felt reborn felt redemption in those moments of weakness as everything she owned was disheveled and destroyed. Everything holding her back, she no longer had to live in the past.
The mortal born was now free to start over, and shed promised herself something fitting.
Plate Armor like her sister, with a new attitude and ferocity to match. Shed put her armor on and show the world just how strong she was, with murderous rage like mother dearest.
Next time would be different she promised herself, she wouldn't be taken advantage of so freely again as she lamented in her fortress of solitude alone shaken and distressed as she harnessed her feelings into a strength shed never known before.
Was this her gift the imperial owl mentioned?
Hatred, that burned like red hot embers in her heart?